You know those crime shows, where the neighbor/ boyfriend kills someone? And nobody calls or finds out , or thinks theres trouble for days or weeks. And by then your bodys competely decayed and gone.
When I left one of 100 ex’s houses’ in the middle of the night, to go to another abusive ex, awake at 3am. … I found out, how long it would take for someone to care.
And it was so sad.
Luckily I’m laughing through the pain now. But oh my
GOD.
He reported me missing. Wasn’t I , though?
After hours of arguing and crying about him grinding his teeth and me feeling too anxious to be
“intimate” after lines and lines of coke.
I said “just let me take a walk.”
My stuff was already moved in.
That’s what I did. Easy peasy.
I’m your new girlfriend, life partner, roomate, drug dealer, whatever.
Help me and hurt me at the same time.
So as I lied to him about leaving, I was texting my ex the truth.
No i’m not upstae, i’m a few towns away,
And I need you
To save me.
My now “ex” called the cops the same morning. He never went to sleep.
My ex I was staying with, now. Had gotten a call from the cops.
Looking for a missing person.
Mind you, I had no friends. I had drug dealers.
I had potential job contacts, if that.
Nobody answered this guy’s call.
My mom, I guess.
My dad, straight to voicemail.
My brother, who fucking knows right.
So he hides me out a few days, for the weekend, and I go back home.
But I’m not back home.
My ex is waiting outside, like I made the whole thing up.
again.
And I run upstairs and I kiss my other ex goodbye.
And that’s fucked. And he’s laughing like i’m not running for my life.
AGAIN.
I call the cops, on my self.
But mostly , him.
He actually has the audacity to pretend to say “hello precint 105 we’re here to help.”
And I made the mistake of trusting a pig.
And a cop..
He comes upstairs and I’m too scrawny to put the chain on the door.
He makes his way in and goes WHAT THE FUCK HANNAH WHAT THE FUCK.
All this drama and chaos. and Fuck I’m tired.
I really lost track of this story line, huh.
Bottom line no one cares if I died, today.
No one would text me.
No one would be suprised.
Or asked if I was okay.
I don’t get any hi how are you.
Let’s talk about life.
And what kills me is
in those 2 seconds of deciding to save myself.
Should I REALLY have even bothered?
..
